Isms

This came in through email. Some of you probably have seen it.

Taoism: Crap happens.
Confucianism: Confucius says, crap happens.
Buddhism: If crap happens, it isn't really crap.
Zen: What is the sound of crap happening?
Hinduism: This crap happened before.
Islam: If crap happens, it is the will of Allah.
Protestantism: Let crap happen to someone else.
Native American: What is the medicine of crap?
Catholicism: If crap happens, you deserve it.
Judaism: Why does this crap always happen to us?
Pantheism: It's all the same crap.
Atheism: I don't believe this crap.
Agnosticism: What is this crap?

I would revise the last two and make a few additions:

Atheism: There is no crap.
Agnosticism: This may or may not be crap.
Secular humanism: If you think this is crap, I'm okay with that.
Rationalism: Crap happens independently of your wishes, whims or desires.
Objectivism: Crap is crap. Undertand it. Integrate it. Overcome it.